Like So-called "Pension Reform": It's Quite Simple

Let’s imagine we haven’t paid our bills for a very long time, perhaps our mortgage or rent, taxes and insurance policies, credit cards and utility bills. Now let’s do what Illinois politicians are trying to do to public employees: let’s ask our banks, county collector, and companies to whom we are indebted to pay down what we owe them. 

That’s right! It’s quite simple; besides it’s all about “shared sacrifice,” isn’t it? So let’s write our own piece of legislation reform and proclaim that bank and business CEOs must cap their earnings, raise their retirement ages, reduce their Cost-of-Living Adjustments, and shift the burden of debts to them instead of us. In short, let's break a contract!

As many politicians have often whined that “we have to do something,” our crafty idea is just like the Illinois General Assembly’s so-called “pension reform” bill.

And like these liars and thieves who are attempting to break a constitutional contract with public employees and retirees, let’s shift our debts to those for whom we owe money and hire lobbyists from the Civic Committee, Civic Federation or Illinois Policy Institute; let's enlist corporate-owned media, like the Chicago Tribune and other corporate-bought entities, to promulgate our scam. Let's hire a few dishonest lawyers and accountants to put pressure on our lenders and to challenge the legality of what is owed. Let's also claim we are in a financial crisis, but it's not our fault!

Could it be that simple for us to transfer the burden of what we owe our moneylenders, challenge our contractual obligations in the courts, and rewrite the laws and policies in our favor? After all, we would be simply following the egregious, corrupt tradition of Illinois politics.

-Glen Brown